I'm wearing my sad face.

That's just depressing. I realize maybe he was more tired than sad, but dammit. I'm sad, especially since being that close means that they were virtually tied if Contador wasn't such a big fat dick.

Here's the scene as I remember it, Andy and Alberto are represented as muppet baby versions of themselves.

Andy: Race you to the top! Hehe!

Alberto: (Oh poop. He got a head start.) I don't want to play!

Andy: (Oh no! I tripped on a rock!) Ouch!

Alberto: Hahaha! Now I'm going to win! (Run run run)

I've broken it down like this because otherwise I'll use lots of swearing, and lots of inappropriate things that would make even Contador haters cringe a little. I figure if I can imagine Contador as a little miss piggy I won't think about raping him with a pitchfork(as much). I can calmly say, yes, miss piggy is a bitch, but she's just a baby, so you can't throttle her until her head pops off. Because some people think that's wrong.

And hopefully, when I do meet Contador, I'm able to control myself in that manner as well. Yes, he's a complete asshole, but you'll go to prison if you hurt him, unless the jury saw the race, then I'll probably get off scott free...But I can't think like that. Then that urge to bludgeoned bubbles to the top.

Fabian did really awesome, one guy was 17 seconds away and then after that everyone wasn't even close, so that's a great win for him. Also Dave Zabriskie did great, and he's just a fun nutcase, case in point complements of twitter.

Last year on the way to Paris I had to stop in an Indian restaurant for an emergency crap. I hope this doesn't happen again tomorrow. about 2 hours ago via web

so it was fun to see him do well. I always kind of wondered what they did if they had to take a nature break that wasn't the standard pee off to the side. It's great to learn cause knowledge is power!(why can't I remember where that's from but it's super glued into my brain?)

But really. 39 seconds overall. You know, the same 39 seconds Alberto roofied and raped Andy to win? Yeah. That hurts. A lot.

I hope that smug son of a bitch feels like crap about that forever. If he ever has kids I hope he hides that victory in shame. "Yeah yeah, won that year. Let's look at the year before though, where I really kicked ass!" I bet he'll just lie about it. Gah.

I AM DEPRESSED BY THIS WHOLE THING.

I think it was an extra kick in the pants because Andy did so well. If he had really fucked up the time trial, maybe I would have been able to move on and say "See, Alberto had it in the bag, sure he made a real dick move that day, but that's just because he's a fucking coward, it's cool though, because he ended up winning in the end anyway."

You know, Like, two minutes, maybe I would have even been good with a minute and a half. Just more of a buffer than the time you FUCKING ROBBED WHEN YOU WERE BEING A FUCKING CHEAT.

Yeah, I guess there's still some rage simmering among the depression. I can live with that.

I keep thinking I want Alberto to crash out tomorrow, but you know what? That wouldn't change anything, that would just make it an empty win. Kind of like what Alberto has right now. But I still wonder if that would feel a little better.

I would be okay with people throwing rotten vegetables at Alberto though. I feel like that would heal some of the deeper wounds.

I think I will imagine him like this. Happy, cute smile. IN YELLOW. Also sometimes naked. But that has nothing to do with the race.

TOTALLY BUMMED DOOD.

But happy Andy is here to make it all better. And possibly one of those little stuffed torture dolls that I stuck Contador's face on. I'm going to need more push-pins.